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We are getting married! This is one of the mostbeautiful and significant moments of our lives... And then follows a magical period of preparations, rehearsals, and planning. Preparing for the wedding, choosing the dress of your dreams, making space in the house... and, of course, making the wedding list.
Where does the wedding list come from?
And here we come to the crux of today's theme. This custom, which actually originated in the United States, has only been in use in Italy since the 1970s, to help guests in the difficult decision of which gift the bride and groom receive, so that it is useful and appreciated. Before the introduction of this custom, it was very common to receive as many as five toasters, countless sugar bowls and expensive gifts that were unfortunately not very welcome. By making a wedding list, however, the bride and groom have the opportunity to direct their guests towards what they find most welcome and useful.
How to make the most of the wedding list?
Whether you are setting up house for the first time or already living together, it is important to use this very useful tool in the best possible way and not to waste it!
Furnishing a house and equipping it with everything you could possibly need is a costly affair, as those who live together know, and one often has to be careful with one's expenses and make several sacrifices. By making a wedding list, however, the question of price takes a back seat and the bride and groom have the opportunity to choose what they want from a wide range of possibilities. Making a wedding list, however, is not an easy way to decorate your home, regardless of the cost: the rule of decency remains and you must think that your guests want to give you a gift, not finance a customised decoration.
Even if, as I said, you already live together, the wedding list is an unmissable opportunity to offer you beautiful things that you might not buy for yourself.
What to put on the wish list?
Before going to the wedding registry, it would be wise to make a list of what you consider important. Making a list can be difficult, but it helps you to understand what you really want and avoid getting carried away. Here are some guidelines to keep in mind.
- Make rich and varied wedding lists in order to give the widest possible choice to your guests.
- Enter items in all price ranges, even those who have only received the participation may want to give you a thought
- Deposit your wedding list at least two months before the wedding date. This will give those who wish to give you a gift plenty of time to choose and evaluate their purchase.
- Choose objects as much as possible that will please both you and the person offering them.
- Remember that the giver of a gift will be more likely to choose something lasting, that will stay with you and remind you of the giver.
What is right to put on the list and what is not?
I would assume that the wedding list should be for gifts of use to both spouses, i.e. excluding personal items, clothing or jewellery.
A new house needs a lot of things, but can we put everything on the list? For example, f undamental household appliances, can I put them on the list? My advice is not to put them on the list. I think that the list, at least the one reserved for the majority of guests, should follow some minimum rules of elegance. There will always be close relatives who will ask you in a roundabout way what you need and will perhaps be happy to give you the washing machine or the dishwasher.
Another recent practice that I find inelegant is to make a 'list' in a travel agency to pay for the honeymoon. This type of wedding registry is lacking in one of the fundamental characteristics of a good wedding registry: the giver is not involved in the choice of gift. Their role is reduced to a simple payment of money. In the case of a real wedding list, on the other hand, the giver participates in the choice, because in addition to offering the gift, he makes a real choice of taste, even if in a more limited selection of products, selected by the couple.
Where do we register?
It may happen that the bride and groom come from different towns, or that the wedding guests do not live in the same town as the bride and groom. What should you do then? Where is it best to make the list? You can make several lists in the cities of origin of the bride and groom or in the city where the bride and groom are going to live, but today there is also the very convenient possibility of making an online wedding list. Having dealt with these thorny preliminaries, it's now time to have fun!
Let's go shopping together, and here are my tips. First of all, it is very important that you include as varied and valuable gifts as possible, so that anyone can give you a simple thought. You can include small appliances and kitchen utensils, fine linen, televisions, technological gadgets, but also silverware, antiques, paintings and carpets.
The table
Let's start with the area of the house I love most, the table and kitchen. This is generally the area that requires the most investment, particularly if you like to receive guests at home. First of all, you will need plates, glasses and cutlery. My first piece of advice is never to buy a set of plates for less than 12 places, even if you think there will never be more than eight of you at the table. Why? First of all, because it can always happen that you have an unexpected guest and also because plates break over time, it is in their nature, and a service that starts out "reduced" will soon be unusable. Let me tell you about my personal experience: I have always loved cooking and receiving, so much so that Giuliano and I have always organised dinners for up to 40 people at home at weekends. Our home has always been a seaport, with friends coming and going and others joining us at the last minute. Opening your own home is beautiful and believe me it can be really easy, but you need to be equipped! That's why when we got married we chose sets of twelve plates with double flat plates and even provided ourselves with a melamine plate service with no less than 100 flat plates and 100 dessert plates for standing or garden dinners.
My advice is therefore to list two sets of plates, one more elegant and one more everyday. If you don't have the clearest ideas, go for the classic, choose a single-colour everyday service and a white or ivory one, perhaps with a gold profile for the more elegant one. These two services can always be integrated over time and perhaps combined with sweet dishes or other more decorated or fancy items. Do you have large families and already know that there will be many of you for the holidays? No problem, either do as I do and take a quantity of plates or simply use all your plates on those occasions, mixing your services. This is another reason why I say to you: when in doubt, stay neutral! Finally, remember to list several types of serving dishes and maybe a set of under plates.
The same applies a little to glasses; you'll need an everyday service that's easy to wash in the dishwasher and another one for occasions with slightly higher stems. Add whisky glasses to tumblers, which you will also use for different types of aperitifs or drinks. As far as cutlery is concerned, my advice would be to list a single service suitable for each occasion and as complete as possible. You should therefore provide for service cutlery and fish cutlery. If you want modern cutlery, steel is perfect, but choose it of excellent workmanship and with an elegant line, because you will always use it. If, on the other hand, you like classic or silver cutlery, If you like classic or silver cutlery, then dedicate a portion of your wedding registry to a beautiful silver-plated metal service, and here I recommend even more, get it of excellent quality so that it accompanies you throughout your life.
As far as table linen is concerned, a number of guests are pleased to be able to offer a gift that traditionally accompanies the joyful moments of a family, such as a beautiful tablecloth. Provide one or two for everyday use and at least one for special occasions. Don't forget to add napkins. Consider what you would like to give as a gift and try to list beautiful and durable items that the giver will be happy to have chosen.
The kitchen
Do you like to cook? Well, this is the opportunity of a lifetime to choose items to make up your own personal chef's equipment. The passion for cooking is a pleasure shared by many, so it won't be difficult to find among your guests, who will give you with particular pleasure beautiful and useful objects such as a mixer or a beautiful set of professional knives. As I told you at the beginning, in fact, drawing up a Wedding List is a good opportunity to fulfil your wishes without worrying too much about checking prices....now or never!
Objects that might seem a little crazy in everyday life will make you happy and those who want to give you a memorable and welcome gift. When I got married, I chose a series of beautiful copper pots, which I use with pleasure and I remember that the person who gave them to me, a dear family friend who is also a passionate cook, was happy and satisfied with her choice. Are you married couples already living together? Do you already have the essentials? However, there are dozens of beautiful and useful objects for your home that you probably didn't have and that you will find in time. The choice for the kitchen is vast, think of knives, the most varied utensils, for making pasta or bread, for cooking with the most modern techniques. But of course you can also think of design or art objects that will embellish your home.
Area living
If you make a list in a shop that sells furniture, you will have an endless choice of objects of all types and all values. Some of the most beautiful gifts I've ever received are lamps, which still decorate my home in fond memories of the person who generously gave them to me. Vases, carpets, paintings, exist in all prices and levels and will make your home beautiful and unique. This whole area is very popular with the giver because it gives an idea of durability. For this same reason, and people love to offer silver objects, because they remain in time and accompany with a good memory all the life of the exhibits.
Linen
Can I include bed linen or towels in my wedding list? Yes, linen is also a welcome gift for the giver and the receiver.
The important thing is to choose beautiful articles in fine fabrics and finishes, for the already mentioned principle that whoever gives you something wants to do you a favour but also give you an object that will last over time. For this reason, linen sheets are welcome, if you wish, even embroidered with the initials of the bride and groom, blankets in fine yarns, and also sets of coordinated and possibly personalised towels or bathrobes!
